I'll Never Let You Go I Promise
by YouGoFromThere
Summary: JAPRIL AU - What happens when two complete opposites fall in love and suddenly everything changes one unfateful day. Inspired by the movie 'The Vow'. WARNING : Deals with depression and self harming so if you're not into it, I suggest you not to read it. Thank you!
1. Best Day Of My Life

_**April**_

 _"Mom where are my sneakers? I'm late for college."_ I shout. _"It's where they always are. I don't know why you've to keep asking me every day April? Are you so incapable of finding your own stuff?"_ my mother replies back.

I know where they're placed but I still Iike the little conversations we have because we barely talk with each other, she is mostly at the hospital working. She is a famous surgeon and I have everything except for my mother's love.

 _Mom! What's for breakfast?"_ I ask and go into the kitchen to see. The counters are empty and the refrigerator is empty as shit except for some leftover pizza from last night.

 _"B_ _uy something. I don't have time to cook April"_ my mother retorts. I don't know why she can't be a normal mother for once.

I walk up to the rack, wear my sneakers. I pick up my bag, my car keys and shut the door with a loud thud. I rev up the car and leave for college. I don't wanna be late for my first day.

I put on the radio and Taylor Swifts Bad Blood is on. Whenever I'm sad and angry I don't know why Tay's voice always makes me feel good. My phone rings which is in the bag. I reach to pick it up when suddenly a boy on a bike crosses the road. I step on the brake but the boy manages to get hit by my car. I'm shocked and just stare at him through the wind shield who lies on the road with his bike on top of him.

 _ **Jackson**_

 _"Where have you been Jackson Avery?"_ my mother asks with a concerned look on her face. _"I thought you'd miss your first day of college baby boy."_

 _"Mom! I'm not your baby boy anymore!! I went to the garage for some repairs after church. But do I really have to go to college?"_ I'm not sure about college since it's way too much for us to pay for but my mother is hell bent on sending me off to college so I've a good future.

 _"You're always gonna be my baby boy and I want nothing more than seeing my handsome boy in that black coat getting your degree and I pray to Jesus he makes it happen. It's my last wish that you graduate and become a world famous surgeon."_ my mother says with tears in her eyes like she knows her fate.

 _"Damn it Mom! you're not gonna die. I'm saving up money for your surgery and you're gonna be there when I graduate I assure you."_ I reply hiding the tears that well up in my eyes.

 _"No cursing Jackson! Apologize! Now go and get ready or you're gonna be late. I've made pancakes_ _, your favorite, so you have a good start."_ my mother says. _"Sorry Mom"_ I apologize.

I walk up to my room upstairs, take a shower and change into a casual jeans and t-shirt. I've nothing much to choose from but I make do with what I have. I sit on the chair for breakfast and thank Lord for what he has to offer and eat those delicious pancakes. My mother sure knows how to make my day better. _"Mom I'm leaving. The pancakes were lovely. Thank you Ma!"_. I leave the house closing the door and walk up to the bike which I won in an Innovation contest.

I wear my helmet and ride the bike in a medium pace. I don't want anything to happen to it mostly because I don't have extra money for the repairs. I admire the fresh air from the trees and breathe in deeply.

The next second I know I'm on the ground with my bike on me. There's a black car. I can't see who's in the driver seat. I try to move but I can't because of the bikes weight.

Three guys standing nearby come and lift the bike. I move my legs and try to stand but I'm back on the ground. My legs are shaking due to the impact. I think I've sprained my ankle.

I manage to see the girl in the driver's seat. She is really beautiful. She has lovely green eyes like the ocean. She is short and has lovely red hair. I'm mesmerized by the way she looks. She comes out of her car and towards me.

 _"Hello Mister. Are you alright?"_ she asks. Her voice is soothing and nice to hear. _"I... Uh... I...um.."_ I'm speechless. I can't seem to form words. I try to speak but I can't. I'm just staring at her.

 _Is this what love at first sight is? Then most definitely I'm in love with this girl who just hit me by her_ car. If it was anybody else I would have punched his face. But she has me mesmerized.

 _"Hello? Can you hear me? Are you okay??? Are you deaf or something? Can you speak? "_ she tries to ask me by ASL but I've no idea what it means. She take my phone from nearby and types her number, gives herself a call. _"Oh great! I just hit a deaf and dumb boy. I'll call you later. I've somewhere I need to be. I'm really sorry for your bike."_ she says. _"I...uh... I'm not deaf or dumb"_ I say to myself as she hurries off in her car.

My friend Mark Sloan passes by and screams _"What happened Jackson? Who did this to you?"_. When reality sinks in I turn around and see my bike lying on the ground almost lifeless. I can't believe I just let a girl hit me and leave without any altercation. I promise myself I'm not gonna leave her just like that after what she did to my bike. I'm not going to let whatever I felt, take over me again. I call the tow guys to take my bike to the garage and leave for college with Mark.


	2. Secrets

**WARNING - Some sort of depression. Please do give a review about what you think I should do. I've written in the end.**

 _April_

I don't know why I left that guy without helping him. I barely remember his face. I should have helped him, this is unlike me. I'm not the one who hurts others. Maybe I should call him. I should focus on the road for now or I'm going to hit someone again.

"Where the fuck is your phone? Why didn't you pick up my call?" asks Arizona.

"Oh! So it was you! I ran into some trouble thanks to your phone call." I reply getting out of the car and check out the front bumper. Just some minor dents and scratches.

"So now it's my fault? I can't believe you're actually saying that you spoiled brat." she retorts. "Not now, Ari" I say and head inside. "What happened Apes? she asks.

Everyone thinks I'm a brat because my mother's rich but no one realizes that I don't need money. _I need love_. If they only step in my shoes for a single day maybe they would realize.

"I hit a guy with my car and I ran away from there." I say rushing to class.

"You didn't stop to help him? Wow!" she looks at me shocked. "You are the kind of girl who helps a squirrel even if it is fine and you left that poor boy bleed to death all by himself? Oh my God the end is near!" her sarcasm speaking.

"Thanks Ari! You're really helping. He was fine! At least he looked fine. I don't know! I have his number though. I'm gonna call him up later."

"You hit him with your car and now you're gonna hit on him? Nice Apes! Real nice!" she says grinning trying to make me laugh. I do chuckle at how hard she is trying.

First up is Biology. Which I hate really, my mother is the one who enrolled me in it. I wanted to major in business. I wanna be a businesswoman, own my company, lead!

"Hey, You!!" I hear an excited voice, never heard before, but it takes me aback. I turn around staring at what I see.

 _Jackson_

It's her. I can't believe my eyes. Though I've just seen her once. It's like she is tattooed into my mind. I see her beautiful red hair just slightly flowing because of the wind. She is wearing an off shoulder top, black in color with regular jeans. It really suits her. I can't contain my excitement and call out to her "Hey, you!!". She turns around pretty shocked and I can see her eyes shifting left to right so fast. Clearly she is nervous.

"So now you decide to speak Mr. ? I thought you were dumb." she asks.

And... I'm at a loss of words again. "I'm... Uh... I'm dumb" I say to her foolishly.

"Is this him? He is hot!!" says a blonde who is with her. The redhead shushes her.

"What the hell is wrong with you Jackson? You're speaking already. He is stupid not dumb." Mark hits my head annoyed.

"You shouldn't have jumped the signal like that Jackson. What if something happened to you? I'd be in trouble. What about your family... " she goes on speaking, her voice fading.

I just smile and nod not hearing what she is saying. My mind is focused on the way her lips move. So pink, so plump. I could kiss her right now to shut her beautiful mouth but that's not what good boys are taught to and I've no idea how to kiss. I've never kissed anyone before.

Mark pulls me away from her as the cIass is gonna start.

"Apes we gotta go or we'd not get any place to sit." the blonde says.

 _Apes! She called her Apes. Short for Apple? Sounds weird to keep Apple as a name. But she is red like an Apple. Hmm... APRIL! Could be April. I guess I've to gather all my courage to ask her name._

"My name is Derek, I'm your Biology Professor...I'd like you all to introduce yourselves and tell me why you chose Biology" I turn around to find her. I can't see her anywhere and then I spot her way down at the first bench.

Everyone says their names and about their family and background. And then she gets up and says "Hello everyone. My name is April Kepner." I'm happy that I guessed her name right. "My mother's a surgeon and this was her idea" she says with a tint of sadness in her voice and sits.

More students introduce themselves. Finally it's my chance "Hey everyone, my name is Jackson Avery. My mother's name is Catherine. I'm a Christian. It's my mother's dream that I become a doctor one day and now it's mine to achieve it." she turns around to look at me I look at her back.

"And I can speak." I say and everyone bursts out laughing but all I can see is that April's sadness has been replaced with a smile that lit up the whole room. She should smile more often and the world would be a better place to live in already.

"Really? Who would've knew you could speak?! Let's continue the class. Welcome everyone." the Professor jokes. After the class is over April disappears again.

"Dude you got hit by a girl?" Mark asks at the cafeteria.

"She came out of nowhere. I didn't have any choice."

"She was screaming at you like you jumped a red light?!"

"Did she say that?!" I stare unknowingly. "But it was a green light I remember clearly"

"Then why didn't you say her it was her fault. Dude are you okay? Should we go to the hospital again to get you checked? You've been behaving weirdly. Did you hit your head? Are you concussed?"

We did head to a hospital on the way before. I had just sprained my leg. No big deal and I don't have the liberty not to attend my first class. Seeing her made me forget my pain anyway.

"Nah I'm okay. Let's head out." as we are about to go I see her and her friend coming towards me.

 _April_

I see him talking to his friend. His name is Jackson. There's something about his eyes, they're a brilliant blue, just like the morning sky. They're just so calm and composed. I feel like I could get lost in the vastness of his eyes.

"Hey Jackson! I'm really sorry about earlier. I'm April and this is Arizona. I shouldn't have blasted off on you like that." I say with a smile filled with guilt.

"Hi. You've got a nice name. It's ok you don't have to be sorry you know. It was my fault."

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me Jackson? You said it was a green light. Listen up girl, my friend here is out of his mind. But I ain't. It was totally and completely your fault." His friend points at me frustrated.

"Hey Mark don't use such a crude language in front of girls. And stop pointing fingers. It's not polite. Don't mind him he is angry. He is right though it was a green light. You jumped the signal." he says smiling.

I don't remember seeing the traffic light. It could very well be my fault. "Oh I'm really sorry. I didn't know. How is your bike?" I say ashamed of myself for not knowing the truth.

I like him. He is well behaved and doesn't get angry. Must be his Christian upbringing.

"It's ok. My bike is dead. Don't worry. Oh sh... I gotta go. Nice meeting you April" he hurries off.

I wave and he is long gone. He is off in such a hurry. Maybe someone's waiting for him. Ari pulls me "If you're done staring at his ass we should leave."

"Yes Ari! I was staring at his perfect ass. You jealous? I thought you were into girls... actually... _girl._.. Callie!" I see her cheeks turn red when I say Callie.

I'm back at home. I gather my guts to speak to my mother about the accident. She is definitely gonna freak, call me names even. Even after so many years I haven't gotten used to her anger. It still hurts me.

I go into the kitchen to make dinner. I hear the door open and close loudly.

"April Kepner what's the dent on your front bumper? Are you trying to sabotage your medical career before you've even started? You're not going to achieve anything by fooling around with your friends April. You've gotta be serious in your life. Don't make me regret giving you birth. I'm putting up with your shit since the day you were born. I should never have given you my name. You're just like your father. USELESS! WORTHLESS!!"

My eyes fill up. There's a pool forming in my eyes. I can't breathe. I'm suffocating. Her words stab my heart as they replay in my head a million times. I rub upstairs and slam the door close. I fall on my bed and cry, sobbing uncontrollably. I don't know why she has to say that everytime. Does she hate me? Did she not need me? Why did she give birth to me if she didn't want me? Maybe I am worthless and useless like my father. I've never met the man. My mind is filled with so many questions. I roll up my sleeves and stare. Not thinking anymore. I've a sudden urge. I shift to the side of my bed and open my drawer.

The next minute is blank to me. I don't feel anything. No pain. Blood forming a line, dripping from where I've cut myself just now. Tears turned into anger. Suffocation slowly disappearing. My phone lights up.

 _"HEY APRIL, IT'S ME JACKSON. YOU OK? I'M SORRY FOR RUNNING OFF"_

 **P. S - I'm really sorry if you don't like me adding a bit of depression. Self harming is NOT GOOD but I have to send out a message for young girls out there who still do it that it's not SAFE. NOTHING GOOD COMES OUT OF IT. I've been fighting with depression all my life and I'm gonna write up how I fought with it through April. I hope it would help someone. But if you don't want me to continue with it I'm not going to mention it again I promise. I'll edit it out.**


	3. Two More Lonely People

_Jackson_

"Did you see that football match last night? It was awesome!! That goal went right through the keeper!!"

"Dude that must've been cool but I was busy ya know.. with Lexie."

"Oh! I never knew you guys are still together"

"Yeah I kinda apologized to her and we got back. What about you? Anyone yet??"

"Nope!!! You know I'm waiting for the one, Mark."

"What about that redhead from the other day? Looked like you were going crazy."

"I messaged her a few days back and I never got a reply."

"She is ignoring you like you don't exist."

It's time for class and I look in the crowd for April. I don't spot her anywhere. It's been five days. Professor Shepherd is going on teaching us the basics about the heart. The class is over for what seems like forever. I rush to Arizona.

"Hey! Arizona!! Hold up"

"Oh Hi. Hey. Jackson!" she turns around.

"How you doin'?"

"I'm fine. What about you?"

"I'm okay! Do you know where's April?"

"Honestly, I've no idea! She won't return my calls. I'm gonna check on her later today."

"Yeah sure! It's just that it's been five days and I haven't seen her in college."

"You've been counting days? What're you stalking her?" she jokes. "She does it all the time. Don't worry!"

"Nah! It's just that I never saw her after that day. I thought she might be guilty for hitting me."

"You know what Jackson? You should come with me"

"Sure let's get some food and we'll go."

We reach the cafeteria, grab some food and leave. The surroundings are posh. Lovely trees. These are like huge villas. I realize that she must be crazy rich. Way out of my league.

We reach a huge house. Everything is straight out of those Home Sweet Home magazines. Arizona rings the doorbell.

"April?! APRIL!!!! Open up Apes!" Arizona shouts. There's no reply so she picks up her phone and dials her number. "I can hear your phone ring, you dumbhead. Open up or I'm gonna break the door first and then your bones."

Still there's no reply. Arizona starts to search for something in the pot placed outside the door. Oh it's a key. She opens up the door.

Everything is a mess in the house. We sense that something is not right. Arizona rushes upstairs.

"APRIL!! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!" she shouts but I can clearly sense the horror in her voice.

I rush upstairs and find April lying on the bed.

"APRIL!!!!"

 _I'd love it if you guys review it. I've no idea whether you guys like it or not. Whether I should continue writing or not. Thank you so much for reading._


	4. In My Blood

_**Jackson**_

BLOOD! A pool of blood..!! April is lying on the bed. Her forearm slashed. The wound is not fresh. Looking at the wound I'd say she would need stitches. I observe her body carefully. Her chests rises and sinks back down. I heave a sigh of relief. Arizona shakes her and wakes her up. I don't know what has happened but I excuse myself outside so she doesn't feel ashamed by me seeing her in this state.

I can hear her crying as I go downstairs. My heart feels like it's on fire. It has stopped beating. I wanna hurt the person who brought tears in her eyes. I don't know why she would go to such an extent of harming herself. What's wrong with her? Is it because of a guy? I've no idea what happened or what to do. I feel _helpless_.

 _The Lord is close to the broken hearted_

 _And saves those who are crushed in spirit._

 _(Psalm 34:18)_

So where is God now? Why isn't he helping April? WHY?? I shake my head, right now I've to be calm and collected. The first thing that comes to my mind is getting first aid. I have no idea where it is. I search the cupboards in the kitchen. I feel like a burglar, I've never been to her place, I shouldn't be doing this but I have to. I can't seem to find it. I remember I've Ethanol in my bag with some gauze and stuff. I rush to it and pick it up. I usually keep it because I get cut and bruised all the time while working at the garage.

I run upstairs and knock on the door.

"You can come in Jackson." I hear April's heavenly voice, which makes my heart beat again.

"Hey April. How you doin'?" I try my best to hide my shocked face.

"I'm perfectly fine" well clearly she is not as she tries to hide the wound with her sleeves. "Ari said you were worried about me, Thanks!!"

"No you ain't fine" I say angrily. "Show me your hand" I say suppressing my anger as I try to reach for her hand but I pull back. She is not even my friend how can I touch her?

"I'm fine Jackson. It's just I got cut while I was... Uh..." she tries to lie her way out.

"Hey I never asked you why or how. I'm just asking you to give me your hand so I can dress it" as much as I want to ask her so many questions I wouldn't wanna scare her off. We are total strangers. She is kind enough to let me in her room right now.

"Give your hand, you idiot. We're your friends." says Arizona her face red as a beet.

"Yes!! We're friends but why don't you guys listen to me? I'm alright. It's already began to heal" she says stubbornly but her eyes beg to differ.

I pull her by the arm, close to me with a bit of force, so she doesn't get hurt. Her skin is so soft and delicate, like it could break right in my hands. The cut is deep enough that I can see the flesh inside. Thank you Lord she didn't hit a vein or anything. I apply the alcohol to her forearm and wipe the wound clean. All the while she is looking at me with those beautiful eyes of hers. I wonder what is going on in her mind. I knew there was a hint of sadness in her eyes the first day I saw her. I wrap her forearm with the bandage. That is definitely leaving a scar. I look closely and I see a few other scars which have almost faded away. She has been doing this since a long time then.

"You might need stitches, would you mind showing it to a doctor? Maybe your mother? She's a doctor? Ain't she?" I ask her and tears well up in her eyes. Her silence says it all. I instantly regret saying that.

"So... We're friends now?" I try to change the topic.

"Um... Yeah well..." she blushes, smiling wide. She forgot her pain.

"Me and you?" I ask again just to see how red she can be.

"ME AND YOU!" she replies happily.

 _ **April**_

I don't know why I said it but I do wanna be his friend. The way he snatched my arm, ever so softly so as to not hurt me but at the same time with force. I felt a tingle in my heart, a _warmth_. Even though he should not have touched me, but his touch felt like coming _home_. Like _magic_. It's not like I've never been touched before. I have been in a fair share of relationships, but no one's made me feel like this with just a touch.

"Oh well, I gotta go Apes. For fucks sake don't do it again. I'm here for you. Couldn't you just talk to someone rather than harming yourself. What about Matthew?" Arizona says.

"Thanks for checking up on me babe. I'm fine. You know how he is Ari. They only want to get in my pants." my brows furrowed.

I see Jackson's expression change suddenly. He is not smiling anymore. "Are you okay Jackson?" I ask him.

"Yup I'm all good, Can you drop me at the garage Arizona?" he replies with a smile. He can't lie. That smile is so fake.

"You gotta go too? You could stay if you like. I still don't know anything about you." I say.

"Well I've to work and you should take rest now. Maybe some other day. Keep dressing the wound every once in a while or I'm gonna stitch it myself." he smiles again.

"We're gonna go now Apes. I'm gonna clean the house real quickly. Please take care of yourself and I wanna see your stupid ass face tomorrow at class or I'm going to drag you all the way up there. Loves babe. Bye" Arizona says with all her concern for me.

"Yeah okay, buhbye both of you." I say.

We've been friends since we were like 3. She is the only close friend I got. Though I had many people who wanted to be friends with me. Materialistic friendship is not what I want. I've never been able to trust anyone, the reason why I'm not in a serious relationship. I've enough problems in my life as it is, I don't need to cry over a broken heart. Arizona came into my life like a blessing. She is more than a bestfriend, a mother to me, my life basically revolved around her.

 _ **Jackson**_

I have so many things going around in my head. I'm waiting for her to clean up the house. It's a real mess.

"Aaaaaaand... It's done. Let's go. I've a date with Callie." she says.

"Well well... Callie?" I smirk.

"My other half. My better half. _The one_." she says.

"Whoa nice! Aren't you a bit too young to say she's the one? So... what's the deal with April?" I blurt it out finally as we walk towards her car.

"Well, you just know when you know and I know she is the one and no one can replace her. What about her?"

"Why did she hurt herself? Boyfriend troubles? You guys need my help??"

"Nope! No way! For Matthew? Never ever would she do that over a guy. It's just her mother has been a jerk to her since like ever. She does it to calm herself down."

"Mother? Is she adopted? Why would any mother do that?"

"She did give her birth. I've no idea. Her mother takes out all of her frustration on Apes. Let's not talk about it."

"Matthew?" I ask vaguely

"He is a guy she met at the mall. They are together. She doesn't like him at all. It's painful to watch them together. The guy couldn't give a fuck even if he wanted to."

"So why stay together?"

"I honestly have no idea why they're together. But... Jackson Avery! Are you jealous? You like April, don't you? I see the way you look at her."

"This is me. You can drop me here." I say as we reach the garage.

"Real smooth. Ignore as much as you like but I do know you like her. You're it denying it either"

I get off the car blushing but I know she is with someone else so I don't have a chance. I started working at the garage when I was way too young. I don't even remember when. I had to work to pay my school fees and everything. Now I'm just earning for my mother's surgery. I work at the garage till late at night and walk towards my home. I see my mother waiting at the porch.

"Hey Ma!" I hug her still wondering about April. "It's cold outside. Let's get inside."

"Jackson there's nothing more warm than seeing your baby boy." she says. I wonder why she is getting so emotional. "I'll call you when dinner is ready. Go and freshen up. I've something to share."

I head to my room. I freshen up and change my clothes and start studying.

 _"Hey Jackson, I'm sorry about not replying to your text the other day_

Her name lighting up the phone brings a smile on my face. I never knew I could smile like that. I have to remember she is taken though. We've to stay friends then.

 _"It's okay. How is your hand treating you? Did you eat?_ \- **Sent**

 _"I'm fine thanks for everything. I didn't have anything yet"_ \- **Received**

 _"You gotta eat April if you want to get well soon. Did you dress it again?" -_ **Sent**

 _"About your bike, I'm gonna pay for the repairs" -_ **Received**

Oh okay. So she is ignoring my question. How is she gonna cook? How is she going to change the bandage? How stupid of me.

"Dinner's ready boy" I hear my mother saying loudly.

"Coming Mom"

 _ **April**_

I have nothing to eat. Refrigerator is empty as usual. I don't usually eat because I hate eating alone. I can't dress the wound myself. I should've asked Ari to sleep over. Well let's just make a cup of instant noodles. Not my favorite but have to make do with what I have. The doorbell rings. I wish it's Ari. I open the door.

"Jackson?" I'm shocked to see him standing at the door holding a brown paper bag which he waves with.

"I brought food" he says with a sorry smile "I thought you might be hungry plus my mother made it so you have to eat, she is the best cook in the whole wide world and some band-aid too so it would be easy for you to dress the wound"

He brought food for me. _FOR ME. No one gives a damn about me but here he is, a total stranger bringing in food_ _and bandages._

"But why?" I ask.

"Because _I care._ And that's what friends are for. Remember?

 _Me and You..!!_ "


	5. You Belong With Me

_Jackson_

I had no idea about self harming. What to do? How to help? Would I drive her to harm herself by my actions? I had so many questions but sadly no one to answer them. So I did what anybody would do. Google it. I don't usually Google for help because I know better than that. Google can't help you diagnose diseases or cure it, yet many find themselves self diagnosing and hurting themselves further rather than going to a certified doctor.

A million results come up and the top most didn't help much. _The act of deliberately harming the surface of one's own body, such as cutting or burning._

I take a deep breath after hours of research I can't seem to find a solution on how to help her. I stumble upon a forum for self harmers. It's made like AA it's what they want whether it be attention, help, how to cope with, etc. I sign up and the forum asks whether I'm a self harmer to which I click no. Then follows a series of questions about myself followed by a number of pointers on how to help others. The first advice read _Be Scared..!!_

 _SCARED - Stay Calm, Associate, Reach, Evaluate, and Discuss._

I'm calm. Next step is Associate. Keep them company. Be their _friend._

I sit there on her couch and she's been eating for a while now like she had nothing since ages. At the first glance no one would ever imagine she is a self harmer. She is just like any other girl out there. I haven't said her another word since I'm in the house. It takes her another 15 minutes to finally finish eating.

She smacks her lips and looks at me.

"Oh my God! That was amazing." she looks content. "Did you eat? I'm sorry I should've offered you some. I'm so stupid"

"Nah you're not stupid. You were just hungry. I'll have it when I get home"

"OK. Sure"

There's an awkward silence. I have no idea what to say next. It just got so complicated, so fast. She doesn't speak either, she is clearly embarrassed.

"I should be going home April. Call me if you need anything, anytime" I smile.

"Can I drop you?" she looks at me apologetically. "It's the least I can do for you"

"It's fine. I'll take a bus ride home"

"At this hour you'd be lucky to see another car on the road. Please let me."

"Okay sure Thank you."

"You're not scared?" she asks.

"Of?"

" _Me..!!_ "

"Should I be? What are you? A vampire or something?" I'm really confused at the moment.

"I mean.. you know.. earlier with the cut." her eyes dead set on the road not wanting to look me in the eye. "Others are"

"Other people know?" I ask shocked. "But I'm not scared. I mean why would I be. You must've a clear explanation as to why you do it. I get it." I explain her trying to make her understand.

"Well, that's a first" she says with a smile. "I've been called a freak, a _weirdo,_ _attention seeking.._ "

"Stop! Just Stop!! You're not a freak or a weirdo or whatever." I interfere before she could continue that sentence. "You're more than that. _You're a person!_ You're going through some issues. That's all. You don't need to believe what others say about you. You know yourself better. Don't you?"

"I do. Thanks for seeing me _as I am_ and not defining me by _what I do._ " she looks at me for the first time in the car, a grateful look. "I did mean it when I said I'm paying for the bike"

"It's my pleasure and you don't have to pay, you know. It was out of my league anyway. My homes nearby" I say pointing to the path "you can drop me here I'll walk."

"But I will and I am gonna pay for it Jackson" she says determined. "Good night"

"Okay! God! You're so stubborn. Good night to you too" I smile. "Oh! By the way even I meant it too" I say as I turn around and start walking towards my home.

"Meant what?" she asks giggling.

"I'm here for you, anytime and anywhere. Just give me a ring." I say and wave goodbye.


	6. I Still Want You

_April_

Life has never been fair to me. I've pined for love so much let it be from my parents or anyone else that it doesn't matter now. Love doesn't exist anymore and it's easier like this. I don't need any feelings involved because happiness is as far as it gets for me. I've heard from my mom's friends that she was in labour for 20 hours with me. It's said that the longer the labour, mothers yearn for the baby as much. My mom didn't even look at me when I was born. I've no idea who my father is, I've neither seen him, nor do I know his name. My mother doesn't mention him unless it's to taunt about how I'm similar to him.

"Hello? Earth to Apes. Can you hear me?"

I snap out of it and see Arizona waving her hands over my face.

"Yeah I'm sorry I totally zoned out."

"Yeah well we gotta go babe. Professor Hunt isn't gonna wait all day for us to join his class." Ari says.

"Let's go"

In Genetics class, I see a few familiar faces, Jackson sitting on the last bench as usual, he waves at me. I wave back and sit ahead of Jackson. Professor Hunt enters the class and bangs on the table to calm the students down.

"As you all know we're gonna have lots of labs in this semester. I want you all to choose a lab partner of the opposite sex. Don't laugh or giggle because I said sex. You're not in high school any more. I don't want girls gossiping around or boys fighting on who's the alpha. They're gonna last the whole year so choose wisely." Professor Hunt says and the whole classroom bursts out laughing. "Well that happened with my last batch of students. I don't want you ruining my lab and breaking my equipments over whose girlfriend Meredith is or why O'Malley is the male hoe. No one wants to know that." the class laughs again and starts to discuss who is gonna be their partners. "Silence! Not now. You can do it later."

The class continues on what genetics plays a role in our life. As soon as the class is over I walk upto Jackson and say "Do you...?"

"April you wanna be my partner?" he asks before I could complete what I wanted to say.

"Oh my God! I was totally gonna ask you that but you said it first." I smile.

"Wow! Bad timing huh? I missed out on the chance of you asking me out?"

"Jackson!!!! Do you wanna be my _lab_ partner or not?" I smack his arm playfully and ask seriously.

"Can it be a bit more pleading? I'm not really feeling it."

"Well I'll see you in lab Jackson Avery. I'll make sure you pay for refusing my lab proposal." I play along.

"I didn't say no yet" he jumps.

"You didn't say yes either so the offer is off the table."

"Hey, hey of course I wanna be your lab partner April." he says with a wide smile and I can't stop blushing. "You wanna grab a coffee later?"

Before I could answer that question I feel a hand on my arm tugging me forcefully and dragging me to a corner.

"Matthew! What are you doing here? What do you want? You're hurting me." I'm almost in tears with the way he is digging his nails into my arm, it hurts so bad.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing with that blue eyed ass?" he says with a face full of anger and rage boiling inside.

"Who? Jackson? He is my friend, Matthew and it's none of your business."

"Oh so that nobody bitch is your friend now. None of my business? It's my business, I'm your boyfriend. Since when do friends flirt around like you just did? Did you guys kiss? Are you sleeping with him? Is that it? You got the hots for him?" with every word he says he digs his nails deeper into my arm.

"Shut the fuck up Matthew. We are just friends and that's it. Stop abusing him. Just stop." I say defending Jackson all the while forgetting his stabbing pain.

"OK babe then kiss me." he says with an evil look in his eye.

"What?!" I ask confused, one minute he is fighting and the next minute he wants a kiss.

"Kiss me, damn it!"

"But I don't want to kiss you right now. We're in the middle of an argument and for God's sake leave my hand, you're hurting me." I try to remove his grip on my arm but to no avail.

"Now you don't want to kiss me? What? That assholes lips are all you wanna taste now? Let me remind you how my lips feel and taste."

"You're so full of yourself Matthew. Just fuck off." I say as I push him back but he grabs me closer and forces himself upon me. He kisses me so roughly, not intimate at all. He is just hurting my lips at the moment and he hasn't left my arm either. I swear he must have burst open my bottom lip because I can taste blood. I try to free my face from him but I can't. I'm not that powerful. I'm smaller compared to his huge body.

In the blink of an eye I see Jackson grabbing his other arm and punching the fucker on the face shouting "You motherfucker!! No, you did not!!". As soon as Matthews grip leaves my arm, I feel blood rushing to the spot, I never realized my arm was numb. He falls to the ground. Arizona hugs me and makes sure I'm okay. Jackson grabs his collar while on top of him and continues beating the shit out of him. Mark intervenes and tries to pull him off of Matthew.

"It's enough. Let's go." Mark says to Jackson.

"How dare you do that to April? Huh?? Answer me" Jackson shaking him by his collar. "Don't you know how to respect women and their wishes. She said no!"

"Let go of him Avery. He is not worth it." Mark tries again to pull him away.

I start sobbing loudly in Ari's arms.

 _Jackson_

As soon as the Professor said find your lab partners, I knew whom I was gonna ask. That little redhead right in front of me. But before I can go to her, she comes to me. The sun rays fall on her just perfectly, she glows just perfectly and her smile is just as perfect. Everything about her is perfect. I shake my head to remove the thoughts and ask her to be my lab partner.

"Oh my God! I was totally gonna ask you that but you said it first." she says grinning. So I missed on her asking me to be her lab partner? Why don't I have any patience? I should've waited.

I kid around saying I missed a chance on her asking me out just to see her smile, deep inside I do want her though.

"Jackson!!!! Do you wanna be my _lab_ partner or not?" she emphasizes on lab 'cause she is annoyed as shit yet she giggles.

"Can it be a bit more pleading? I'm not feeling it." I say just to annoy her further.

"Well I'll see you in lab Jackson Avery. I'll make sure you pay for refusing my lab proposal." she says. Proposal huh? Well at least it's some kind of proposal. Right?

"I didn't say no yet" I exclaim scared she will just leave.

"You didn't say yes either so the offer is off the table." she says I think to annoy me which I clearly am.

"Hey, hey of course I wanna be your lab partner April." I say finally because I don't wanna lose this chance smiling foolishly. I can see her cheeks turn red like a strawberry. "You wanna grab a coffee later?" I ask her.

Suddenly there's a bulky guy dragging her away. I was almost tempted to grab her but I couldn't. I know better than to touch someone against their will. I don't want to be a sinner. I did touch her when she cut her hand but it was in an impulse. I did ask for forgiveness later on. She didn't say a word either so she must know who he is.

"Here comes trouble" Arizona says.

"Trouble?" I question her in search of an answer.

"Yeah! That's Matthew." she says with a disgusted look.

"As in April's boyfriend?" I ask again just to be sure but my heart is begging inside not to be him.

"The one and only. And by the look of him he is very angry and angry Matthew is the worst." she says.

"He looks like he can run over anyone without regret" adds Mark.

"Yeah kind of" I say though I don't know him but I hate him already.

By the looks of it they're having a heated argument. I can see his face becoming red, feels like he is gonna burst like a volcano. He holds April so tightly, she must be in pain. She is trying to remove herself from his clutches. I don't wanna interfere but he is hurting her a lot. I can't just stand here and watch. But I have to... for her... for us... for our friendship. Okay this is becoming a bit too much to just stand here and watch. I'm gonna kick his ass if he doesn't let her go now. What the...??? Fuck this shit. I run towards her grab him, ball my fists up and sucker punch his face in an impulse. I've no idea what I'm doing but she said no to his kiss and he forced her. I'm on top of him punching him like crazy. I've never abused anyone. But this guy here, underneath me deserves every inch of it.

Mark tries to pull me away from him but I can't seem to let him go. I hear a loud sob from a distance and I see April crying her eyes out. Her lips are bruised, torn probably. I can see blood. All I wanna do at the moment is just make sure April is okay so I leave Matthew and go up to her. She has nail imprints on her arm. My anger is boiling up to no control but I can't leave April right now. She has enough things to deal. This can't be one more.

"Are you okay April? I'm so sorry I should've interfered before" I say. My eyes are filled with guilt.

"I.. I... Um 'Kay" that's all she says still sobbing heavily.

"I'm gonna kill that asshole. That son of a bitch!" I'm still so angry but I let go of him because of April or I could've killed him.

Mark pulls me away "Hey calm the fuck down Avery. You're not that person who abuses or resorts to violent measures. What's wrong with you? Who are you dude?" he says. "You could get detained for what you did today"

"She said no! How can he not respect her wishes?? Is it so hard to understand the word NO? She is his girlfriend but that doesn't mean he can treat her like an animal." I say fists balling up again when I think of it.

"I understand what you were trying to do but think about your mother, Avery. How is she gonna feel?" Mark explains to me. I think of my mother and calm down. I'm studying for her. I don't want to break her wishes.

"Thanks Mark. I'll be more careful next time." I say.

"There should be no next time. I gotta go now I've a date with Lexie. Should I drop you?" he says.

"Nah you go. I'm gonna stay here for a while. See you later." He waves goodbye and leaves.

I walk up to April. She has stopped crying but she is clearly shook by the incident. She looks up at me and hugs me tightly. "Thank you Jackson. Thank you so so much!" I don't know what to do I've never hugged another girl in my entire life except my mother, let alone console for a possible assault. I don't know where to keep my hands as I try not to offend her in any way. I place one of my hand on the back of her head and pat her. "It's okay. Everything is gonna be okay. I'm right here. You don't have to worry about anyone." I say.

"Shall I go?" says Arizona.

April breaks the hug and says "If you want to you can. I know it's yours and Callie's second anniversary today. I don't want to hold you up besides Jackson is here."

Hearing her say that there's a warm tingling in my heart. I'm happy she considers me a close enough friend and trusts me.

"Will you be fine? I can stay if you want to." Arizona says.

"I'm fine. You know I don't cry over guys. Besides he didn't mean anything to me." she says trying to suppress her sobs.

"Okay! I'll meet you tomorrow. If you want to talk to me or something you know you can call me right?" Arizona says.

"And disturb your privacy? No thank you! You should go. Just go already!"

"Okay see you" and with that even Arizona leaves.

"Looks like it's just _Me and_ _You_." she shrugs.

"Yeah. I actually have to leave. I have a late shift at the garage so I'd be having lunch with my mother." I look at her apologetically.

She frowns and says "Fine let me at least drop you home."

"It's becoming an every day task huh? Why don't you just stay at my home?" I try to joke but she doesn't bat an eye. "You know what you should come have lunch with us." her eyes glimmer.

"No I can't do that. It's your special time with your mother I can't really do that. Besides what would your mother think of me crashing lunch." she says with mixed feelings. I know she wants to go.

"My mother loves having guests over. So you don't have to worry about that. She'll be so happy, you have no idea. If anything, you're gonna make her sad by not accepting her son's request." I say making a puppy face.

"I can't hurt your mom. Guess I have to come then." she says giggling.

I ring the door bell and my mother yells from the other side. "Be right there, Jackie"

"Ma, I've a friend over" I say.

"Is it Sloan? Haven't seen that dear boy in ages"

"No, mother" I say. She is used to having Mark over. He used to spend a lot of time at my place before he and Lexie were a thing. "It's a girl...uh...friend!!... April!!" _my girlfriend._ I wish I could introduce like that.

"Dear Lord, why didn't you say that before. I've kept her waiting." she says and rushes to open the door.

"Hello Mrs. Avery" April says.

"Hello to you too _Aprilia._ Please come in and do call me Aunt Cathy. I'm sorry my hands are dirty. I was making pot roast." my mother pulls her into a hug and I laugh at her mess up of a name.

"Mother it's April" I chuckle as we enter into the kitchen and sit on the counter.

"No it's not, young man. I might be old but I do remember that it's not April, it's June.

"It's okay Jackson. She can call me whatever she wants."

"Well then, okay! _Riley_ " I say thinking it suits her. She is annoying, stubborn as well but just as lovely.

"Riley? Really? That's the best you got?" she says annoyed just like I said.

"Yeah you're as annoying as annoying gets. It's either that or June because my mother thinks you're _Apriiilllliiiaaaahhhhh_ or _June_." I tease her.

She hits my arm playfully. "Grow up _Jackman_!!" she says with an irritated face.

"Are you bothering this beautiful little girl Jackie??" my mother smacks on the back of my head. "Show her around the house, show her your childhood pictures while the dinner is prepared."

"I don't think she wants to see our house Ma" I shake my head mouthing her to say no.

"I'd love to see your home Aunt Cathy" April says as I stare at her.

I show her around the house. Our house is not so big as Aprils but it's cute in its own way. I show her my room. "This is where the magic happens"

"It's lovely Jackson" she says looking at the neatness of the room. Everything is placed where it should be. I don't like it otherwise. "You love cleaning, don't you?" she asks.

"Well it's a habit of mine. As someone said 'Cleanliness is next to Godliness' and I love being closer to God." I say.

"So you're a devout Christian?" she asks pointing at the Holy Cross hanging on the wall.

"Well I try to be, you know" I say when I hear mother inviting us for dinner. "We should go, mothers calling" I try hard so she should not see my childhood pictures or something else.

"What's that jar of money for? Your wedding? When are you gonna get married? Like in a 100 years?" she asks and tears well up in my eyes. I sniff and she looks at me. She places her hand on my shoulder and says "Hey! What happened? I was just joking."

"It's for my mothers surgery. She has brain tumor. I hope I earn enough before time runs out. I really do. I pray for her every day. I just love her so much." tears falls down from my cheeks.

"I'm so sorry Jackson. I didn't mean to joke around. I mean I didn't know or I wouldn't have."

"Jackson? Aprilia? Dinners ready kids." mother says again.

"We should go." I say wiping the tears off.

"Wait a second.." she pauses and picks up a big picture album from the shelf and runs to the kitchen.

"April..!!" I shout as I run after her.

She looks at the pictures with a smirk while having dinner. Usually my mother doesn't let anything on the dinner table except food, I don't know why she hasn't said a word yet. Maybe it's because she is our guest.

"My God Jackson, you really were the cutest baby on earth!" April says.

"And he still is, my baby boy.!" my mother looks at me with eyes full of love. "Did you know you're the first girl he has ever brought home?" April stares shocked.

"Mommmmm..!! She's a friend." I say embarrassed.

"I've to leave Aunt Cathy. Thanks for the lovely dinner."

"My pleasure dear. You're always welcome, whenever you want to. I'll go do the dishes, Jackson walk her upto the porch." my mother says giving her a hug.

"So you never had a girlfriend or you're keeping her a secret?" she asks me sitting on the tire swing my mama made when I was a kid. "I mean, you're so handsome any girl would be lucky to have you and they would die for those pretty blue eyes." I loved every single word she said but the only girl I want is her.

"I don't think it's any of your business Riley"

"So you're gonna stick with that?" she squints her eyes and stares at me. She looks really pretty when she is angry.

"Yes Riley, it's because you get all riled up." I say and she chuckles shaking her head.

"That is true _Jax._ " she says. She gave me a nickname?

"Jax..?"

"Yup. Jax!!" she nods her giggling. "I'm gonna go now. I had a really good time today. Well most of the day." as soon as she says that her smile fades away and she looks like she is lost in her own thoughts. I'm scared of what she can do to herself.

"Care to join me for some ice cream?" I ask and she smiles again. I guess I know what she needs to avoid.

 _Loneliness._


End file.
